Weekly Debate with the Danielles : Birth Control For Teenager Daughters?

It's that time of the week again! Time for a friendly Debate during "Friendly Debates with the Danielles". Danielle from Happenings of the Harper Household and Danielle from We Don't Have It All hold a weekly meme dedicated to providing fun and friendly debatable subjects. I always look forward to the new week's debate. Who knows what it will be.
Have a blog and want to participate? Click HERE for all of the information. You can link up with everyone and meet some other great bloggers, too. Don't have a blog? Leave a comment with your own opinions below. I love reading them!

Here's this week's topic:

Birth Control For Teenage Daughters: Yay or Nay? What do YOU say?

Who hasn't thought about this subject. Even before I had children, I have been very open about sex and sexuality even with my friends. Heck, one of my best friends wanted to become a sex therapist, so it's something we often talked about. I was a very sexually inquisitive teenager and had so many questions, but it was something my parents would NEVER talk about. To even think about it was taboo and, to my parents, a sin. How could I even consider having sex before marriage? 

Just like a typical teenager, I took matters into my own hands and began experimenting. Luckily, I was smart enough to use contraception and my best friend's mom got us birth control. Having been a teenager, I remember all too well the hormones that surge. For that reason I will always, always be upfront with my children about sex. Whenever they ask, I will tell them. 

I think my husband feels the exact same way. Being a juvenile prosecutor in our town, he's seen so many teenagers get pregnant just because they didn't have protection. We've both seen how important it is to have the sex talk and let the kids know they can come to us if they have questions. So, I would absolutely let my daughter get birth control and/or other types of contraception. I would even talk about an IUD, especially if she had periods and cramps like I did as a teenager.

With all of that said, we have boys, so unless I manage to have a little girl next time (crossing fingers!!:), we won't be talking about the pill. Rather, we'll be talking about respecting young ladies and using other types of protection.

How do you feel about having The Talk? Would you let your daughter get birth control?

Friendly Debates With The Danielles: Spanking: Yay or Nay?

Welcome to another week of Friendly Debates With The Danielles! This is the time of the week where they pick a subject and we debate each other (ehem, in a friendly manner, of course). Have a blog and want to participate? Just click here for all the rules and info. No blog? Then leave a comment below with your own opinion. We love reading them!

Okay, this week's controversial topic:

Spanking: Yay or Nay?

Yes, indeed, this is a controversial topic! As a child, I was always spanked when it came to punishment. There was no sending me to the corner or talking about my actions. I was to pick a belt, spanked with an open palm or worse. Nowadays, this would probably be considered abuse. Because of this, I vowed NEVER to spank or hit my own children. Never! 

So, here I am with two children and what do I say to spanking? I still think it's a horrible idea to spank a child. Have I spanked before. I have admittedly popped my oldest on the behind a few times when I don't know what else to do. I always hate myself afterwards and feel like a failed parent. In my own opinion, it has never worked. In fact, I think it showed him that anger and hitting was acceptable. Totally not my intentions. The few times I have spanked, it backfired. 

Believe me, I know sometimes we are at our wit's end and have know idea what else to do, but there are definitely other ways to handle situations. They aren't as easy as spanking and may not be effective immediately, but I think they have a better positive effect over time. 

Alternatives to Spanking

• Walk away for a moment. In the heat of the moment, it's easy to lose your cool. Walk away, take some deep breaths before punishing. You'll be much more level-headed.
• Use a calm, kind voice. Explain to the child why they are in trouble and why you are upset in words they can understand. When you do this instead of yelling, children are much more likely to listen and comprehend.
• Try to stay positive. Instead of saying, "For the millionth time, go brush your teeth", say "Please go brush your teeth. If you do it right now, we can read a book before bedtime." It gives them incentive and something they can work toward.
• Time Outs do work. Tell your child to go sit on his/her bed or somewhere quiet. They can reflect on the situation and also calm down themselves. This way they are also much more rational.
• Be consistant. This one is probably the most difficult and most important. This is where I have issues. Be consistant in your punishment. You can't laugh and let it go one time and then punish the next time. It causes confusion and will only make the situation worse.

So, what's your opinion? To spank or not to spank? What form of punishment works for your family? 

Friendly Debates with the Danielles Weekly Link-Up: Infant/Toddler Banning At Restaurants

It's time for yet another interested and friendly debate with the Danielles! This week they bring the controversial question of restaurants banning infants and toddlers. What's your opinion? We'd all love to know. Just click here to find out all the info on how your blog can participate. Don't have a blog or time to write a post, leave me a comment with your thoughts. I love reading these responses!
So, without further ado, here's my Q&A for the week!

TOPIC

Banning Infants/Toddlers from Restaurants: Yay or Nay? What do YOU say?

 I have to think back to the days before I had children and (ducking my head), I have to say Yay in some instances. If I'm going out for a romantic dinner and spending over $100, I want it to be quiet, romantic, and relaxing. No crying babies or toddlers flinging food at the table next to me!! I have never taken my children to Five and Ten or Speakeasy, two of my favorite restaurants in Athens, GA and don't think I've ever even seen a child at either. Maybe some children enjoy pan-seared duck and five-course meals and tapas that span over 2 hours, but I'd say most would be ready to run around the restaurant after a good 30 minutes. 

With that said, if I'm going to eat at Olive Garden, Chilis or some other "family restaurant", I think it would be insane to even try banning small children and infants. With this economy many of said restaurants are having trouble staying above water. If they wipe out the whole family aspect they having going, what's left? I don't see the upper-crust of society dining at Red Lobster for a delicious, romantic dinner comparable to Four Seasons. Seriously, I'm not knocking Red Lobster (and I enjoy eating there with my family), but I don't see it becoming highly rated on the Zagat anytime soon.

Okay, I'll end my rant! I know it is sometimes necessary to bring kids along, even on a date, but who'd even want to spend $200 on a romantic dinner with a child at the table? Not me! I'd want to save my money and go when we can get a babysitter. I don't get romantic dates with the hubs much any more, so I'd want to make the most of the night.

What do you think? How would you feel if toddlers and infants were banned from certain restaurants? Yay or Nay?

**For next week's topic, how about regifting, medicating children for ADD/ADHD or using the tv as a babysitter/how long children watch tv? **

Friendly Debates with the Danielles Weekly Link-Up

Welcome to Week 1 of Friendly Debates With The Danielles!

Each Week Danielle from We Don’t Have It All Together, But Together We Have It All and Danielle from Happenings of the Harper Household will host this awesome meme and we would love for you to link up and join us.  There will be a question each week that will require you to think about how you feel about a certain topic and to decide where you stand regarding that topic, then of course share those thoughts!

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We do have a few rules… or rather guidelines… that we would appreciate being followed:

1.)  Please follow the hosts via GFC:  Danielle B. & Danielle H.
2.)  If you link up please leave a comment so we can visit you.
3.)  This is a meme, so you MUST answer the question in a blog post.
4.)  Link directly to the blog post in which you answer the question.
5.)  Grab the button and place either in your post or on your blog.
(You can find the html code in my right side bar).
6.)  At the end of your post leave a suggestion for the following weeks topic.
If we choose your suggestion you will be mentioned and linked to in the following weeks post.

AND THE MOST IMPORTANT RULE

Please respect each others opinions.  This means no bashing of other bloggers in comments on their posts.  Kind words and genuine questions are encouraged.  If you strongly disagree with someone else the place to address your view point is in a post on your own blog.  If we find that you have blatantly disregarded this you will be removed from the linky.

TOPIC“Adult Only Wedding Receptions – Yay or Nay?  What do YOU say?”

 

MyThoughts

As a Mama, I know most of the time I wouldn't be able to go to a wedding reception without my kids, so I'd just have to opt out. Babysitters are expensive, especially with more than one kid. Plus, I look back at our wedding and I can't imagine it without all the kids, my nieces, nephews and others, being there. Children love weddings- the dancing, cake, all the people! I remember being a child and getting to dress up in party dresses for weddings and I felt like a princess. Who would want to rob a child of something so special? Plus, I love watching all the children at weddings and the things they do. It's so hilarious to watch them dancing, sneaking foods, running around, and just being kids. I don't know if a wedding reception would be the same without kids.

What do you think?